Thursday, December 27, 2007

Dinner last night...


Look, Ma, I LOVE teething biscuits. And they are sooooo messy too! It's fun to put them in my hair and all over my face.

Merry Christmas!




Well, we survived Hai's first Christmas with minimal consumerism and only one or two ornament casualties. I took the tree down this morning just to be safe.

I'm not sure Hai got the whole Christmas thing, but he has seemed to notice that several of his toys have been replaced with new toys. He's ok with some of that, but we had to bring back a few favorites.

On Christmas Eve Hai went to his first 5 course dinner at his Tia Maria's house. We made it through the whole dinner with him in the high chair thanks to a lot of Cheerios. Cheerios happen to be one of Hai's favorite foods now. In fact, some days that's all he wants to eat. He really wants the table food, but he doesn't quite have enough teeth to eat it yet (he's really only got 3).

On Christmas day Santa left a several presents for Hai. Some that I had kept from his showers and brought out for Xmas (picture above). So far I think he likes the books that sing the best, but mostly because he knows how to make them work!

We had a very mellow Christmas Day, he played in the park with Christina for a while and them came home and had a big nap. We had Christmas dinner together at home and played with his toys. He got lots of bath toys from Santa and Mommy for Christmas, so he had 2 baths on Christmas day - I think that was probably the highlight for him.

For me this Christmas was wonderful because I got the best present of all, my son Hai. It's incredible what a wonderful gift I feel he is to me. I'm a lucky mom this year!

I hope Santa brought all of you everything you want for the holidays and happy new year!!

Melissa

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Back in the saucer

A play date with Cristian and Christina

Help me make it through the night...

Lately we've been trying to get through the night without a bottle (Hai, not me, I still need one every once in awhile). So far, he can make it from about 11pm to 7 or sometimes even 8am without a bottle, but he's definitely not sleeping that full time.

when he wakes up, he wants to go back to sleep laying ON me. It was cute the first couple of nights, now it's just getting uncomfortable... But I'm learning to sleep with an 11 month old on me. I can't really toss and turn much... :-)

My goal was to get through the night without the bottle before we started heading into the crib full time (he usually starts out there and ends up with me) - that's the next milestone to get through! All this and 3 weeks before I go back to work. Yikes.

We have a very small Christmas tree (4.5 ft) in the condo. We needed the Charlie Brown Christmas tree because there's too many toys around here to fit much else. Hai's mostly getting clothes and books for Christmas because he's got far too many toys already. Put it this way - Grandma and Grandpa decided to send him a toy BOX after they were here!

Hai's somewhat fascinated by the tree, but he's still more interested in walking than anything else. right now he's cruising around the bed - it won't be long before that first drunken sailor step.

He's still an eating machine, yogurt being his latest favorite. I'm going to start mixing yogurt with everything... they eat yogurt with beef in the middle east right? :-)

Well, hope you all are getting prepared for the holidays and if you are in the Bay Area, staying dry!

Love all,

Melissa

Monday, December 10, 2007

I think this is my favorite shot

Family portrait al la Sears Portrait Studio

Parents, closets and more...

Hi everyone,

I know I haven't written in a while, we were busy with Grandma and Grandpa. What a great time Hai had with them - it took me a couple of days to get him to realize that I couldn't be nearly as entertaining on my own as they were! Seriously, who knew how my relationship with my parents would change with a kid - all the focus is on Hai and on helping me - I was really sad to see them leave. I see why folks move closer to their parents now... but I'm not headed to New Mexico yet, I think maybe I have to go back to work here first.

Speaking of work... I'm down to less than one month of leave left. I'm excited to go back to work, but I know I'm going to miss having all day with my boy. Now I also understand all these part-timers I've got on my staff, too. Kate, you are a trooper for going full time to cover for me!! :-)

Today I'm having my hall closet (mainly a "junk closet") turned into a pantry. the current pantry in my kitchen is about the size of a Chinese linen closet - IE 1 foot by 1 foot by 5 feet and definitely not enough room for Hai and me. I think I'll probably end up redesigning all the closets in my condo before I'm through. Who knew such a little person would need so much stuff? Whomever buys this condo next better have a kid - it will have enough storage and baby proofing for a day care center!

One thing we did while we were with Grandma and Grandpa was we went to Sears and did the cheesy portraits - I'll post one so you all can see.

Oh, and we solved the car seat dilemma - as long as I'm in the backseat at night, Hai is OK. I'm interviewing chauffeurs this week if any of you are interested in moonlighting...

Love to all -

Melissa & Hai

Friday, November 23, 2007

Things I'm thankful for this year....(in no particular order)

  • The family leave act
  • Friends that cook, very well, and share their gift
  • Friends that order take out, very well, and share their gift
  • Friends that don't mind a lot of banging on the high chair during thanksgiving dinner
  • The distance between my house and Maria's is only a 10 minute drive (makes a big difference after dark when Hai is howling in the back seat....)
  • The bouncy chair and the friends that gave it to me (thanks to you, I shower regularly)
  • Screw tops
  • waterproof mattress pads
  • Christina, Cristian and Jake, Hai's new friends and their patience with a little "brother"
  • NAPS
  • balls that rattle and make a really good noise on the hardwood floor
  • hand-me-downs
  • Friends that don't mind visiting me after dark (so we don't have to get in the car/car seat)
  • wash and wear
  • Baby Einstein and The Wiggles (so far)
  • Our adoption agencies
  • The dishwasher
  • Peet's coffee
  • Maria, Jaap and Josie and the time they took from their lives to go with us to Vietnam
  • safeway.com
  • Kate, for taking care of business while I'm gone
  • My parents, and the fact that they are coming here next week and we will celebrate Thanksgiving again!

  • And of course... everyone that has been so incredibly supportive of me and of Hai this past year. Work friends, family and extended family - we love you!

I hope everyone has something very special to be thankful for this year, I know I do.

With love and gratitude,

Melissa

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Friday, November 16, 2007

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Car seat meltdown causes major crimp in social plans...

We had a big weekend. Yesterday we went out in the morning and ran some errands (Hai kept falling asleep in the car 2 minutes before we got somewhere, so he got woken up a lot) and then my friend Bob and his daughter Katie came over and also Lila and Karl. Lila and Karl got the crash course in children as Hai was just waking up from a nap and also decided to have a big poo for them. I'm sure the newlyweds are rethinking that whole kid thing right now.

Today we had a big play date with my friend Susan and her son, Bryce. We went for a long stroller ride and played in the park and then we had lunch at Susan's and stroller'd home. Funny thing is, Susan and I worked together years ago and now we live less than a quarter mile from one another and both have sons that are about 6 months apart.

Tonight we were all set to go to auntie Lisa and uncle Mark's house, but Hai had other ideas. The second I put him in the car seat he started to cry. No, make that bellow and cry. No make that scream and cry and sob and howl and generally act like the car seat was cutting his arm off. Yes, I pulled over. After checking for spurting blood, and removing him so he could calm down, I tried to put him back in. Same thing, before I even had the harness snapped... Well, I hitched him in, opened the sun roof to drown out the noise, and went home.

He went straight into a bath, had some dinner and he crawled around the condo for an hour or so. Now he's happily sound asleep. I'm not sure what it was all about, but I really hope it's not a pattern. Tomorrow I will either be buying some car seat toys or a year's supply of ear plugs, or we'll be playing ELMO CD's really loud for a while. If you see us driving down the street, I guess we won't be hard to miss...

I wonder if it's because yesterday our last stop was the doctor's ofc to get his ear checked out? (It's all fine, by the way. In fact, all his tests from the dr. look good from what I can understand...) :-)

Here's to happy commutes to you all...

Melissa

Friday, November 9, 2007

The "exersaucer"

The definition of accomplishment...

It's Friday night, almost 8pm, and I'm in front of the computer in my pajamas...
Hai is asleep in the next room. He's had a bath and been fed. I never thought feeding and bathing a child would feel like such an accomplishment.

It's been quite a week, or at least it's felt that way. Come to think of it, we really didn't do that much. I mean, Hai got his first trip to Safeway in this week, and we ventured to Maria's house for dinner one night, but beyond that... it's amazing how little things can feel like big accomplishments... comforting, actually.

I did actually get to a yoga class twice this week. That's more yoga than I've done in a couple of years, so that's something. Oh, and thanks to Maria's prodding I got a massage today and a manicure/pedicure (ref: "the wonders of a nanny" post from Monday). And I ordered thank you cards... you all will be getting one before the end of the year, I hope.

And what else, ooooohhhh... we finally assembled the "exersaucer". Good God, that damn thing was clearly made by some angry mechanical engineer that got turned down for an astronaut job because he was too unstable. How many screws and springs does a children's toy really need anyway?? And TRIPLE A batteries? 9 of them??? Who has 9 Triple A batteries laying around? (An experienced parent, clearly). I can see how some children have been injured because their parents gave up half way through the assembly process at midnight only to find their maimed child laying helpless in the half-built saucer in the wee hours of the morning as they went to make their coffee...

But... Hai really digs it, so I guess that's all that matters...

Love all,

Melissa

Learning to crawl...

Monday, November 5, 2007

The wonders of a nanny...

Hai and I had a good weekend, but I must say I was glad when the nanny showed up this morning. I asked her to come in for a few hours a week for the next couple of months so that Hai could get used to her. It's working. Today when she came he reached for her and clearly was ready to "go to the park". The nice thing is the park is right across the street from my condo complex, so they are not far away - and he really seems to like the swings, the fall leaves that crunch and the sand. (He's definitely going to be a beach kid).

This weekend we spent a lot of time with his "Tia" Maria and his "cousin" Christina. Christina is 4 and getting used to the idea that her Tia Melissa has a baby. He's pretty fun until he takes time from her is basically how it goes... But she's a great little helper and we had a fun weekend. We went to Stanford shopping mall where Hai saw more dogs than he's probably ever seen in his life and yesterday we braved "Babys R Us", it was actually less painful than I thought.

Now I'm headed to a yoga class to work out the kinks from carrying Hai in the Baby Bjorn and pushing the stroller all weekend... I may just end up in the jacuzzi at the gym, but the intention is there...

And yes, I know I need to take some more pictures, it's on my "to do" list. I can't wait for Grandma and Grandpa to get here, we might actually get some real photos taken!

Hope you all are well!

Melissa

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Good vibrations...

We've had a lot of excitement in the past 24 hours. First there was the earthquake on Tuesday night. Luckily, Hai was in his bouncy chair with the vibrate on because I was eating dinner with Uncle Jaap. We just picked up the boy, chair and all, and stood under the door jam. At one point, Jaap, who was holding the chair said "I think it's still shaking"... I laughed and said "I think that's the chair!!".

I don't think Hai ever knew what happened, he thought the whole thing was some kind of weird game we were playing...

Yesterday we put on our "little devil" shirt and went to the doctor for the first time. I'm convinced now that a pediatrician's job is to make sure that the mother is not killing the kid - not really to make sure the kid is healthy :-)

The good news is, Hai seems to be a happy, healthly little boy. He got 3 shots and has to go back for more in a month, but he's a pretty tough kid and didn't cry too much. Then we had to go to the lab for them to take blood and test for all kinds of things. The poor little guy, they took 5 vials of blood from him!! He was a trooper, but the whole staff of the laboratory watched as he cried. As soon as they took the needle out and I could hold him by myself he was fine again.

But I think the worst part for mom at least was getting the "stool samples" for the lab. Those of you that are parents, hope that you never have to have your kid checked for parasites... ick, is all I'm gonna say.

He's had a little fever thanks to the shots, but the good news is that it's put him on a little bit more normal schedule, he was asleep last night by 11pm and up today a 7:30am, and he's napping now. Maybe the worst of the jetlag is over? :-)

Hope you all had a happy Halloween!

Melissa

Monday, October 29, 2007

Video of the actual giving and receiving ceremony.



I thought many of you would be interested in the actual Vietnamese giving and receiving ceremony. This is the official ceremony that happened on October 8, 2007. It's funny, Hai looks so LITTLE to me in this video, and it seems like a million years ago...

I love Maria's comment about not having hands for the rest of my life... so true! :-)

Love all,

Melissa

Sunday, October 28, 2007

jetlag...

I have always struggled with jetlag. It used to really piss me off when I would travel with Sean and he'd say "I don't get jetlag" as I would be bleary-eyed and trying to run a demo on 3 hours of sleep... (looking back, I think it might have been the copious amounts of caffeine, Sean... :-)

But jetlag for a 9 month old is worse. Poor little guy has no idea where he is, and I think he's a bit puzzled why he can't get mom to play with him at 2am. Actually, last night I gave in and we did play at 2am, and took a bath, and played some more... but he'd been awake since about 11pm, so I held out for a few hours before I finally gave in. Now, it's 10am and he's still sound asleep...

Actually, I kinda hope the sleeping late lasts for a while. Hai was far too much of a morning person in Hanoi. If I could get him to sleep until 7am versus getting up at 5am, that would be pretty good... :-)

Love all,

Melissa

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Home at last

We made it home yesterday (Friday) at about 3:30pm. The flights were not bad at all, Hai seems to like to sleep in airplanes (hurrah!).

Immigration only took about 5minutes - we were expecting 45 - so it was all over in a hurry and Hai is officially in the US on an "IR-3 immigrant visa". A bit more paperwork and we'll be able to get his US passport and a social security number so we can put him to work.

Josie was a star for the past couple of days getting our flights changed to Friday and generally being the pack mule around the airport (who knew such a little person would require so much luggage). I'm sure she's glad to be back in the USA and back with her doggies that missed her terribly, but words can't really describe how much she helped me through these past 2.5 weeks. Zizi, we love you!! :-)

Buk Jaap (uncle Jaap in Vietnamese) picked us up at the airport. I'm certain he has a very unbecoming picture of us pushing our luggage out of customs, but you'll have to check his blog to see it: www.suermondt.com

We had the car seat all ready in Jaap's car, but it did take us a few minutes to see how to adjust it so that it was snug. Probably would have been helpful to read those directions before rather than trying to figure it out after a 18-hour journey, but we managed :-)

We got home to a home cooked meal by Maria of all my favorites. If you ever get a chance to eat Maria's rosemary chicken, do not pass it up. And I have enough creamy mashed potatoes to satisfy me for a week. It was great to see Maria and Christina and Curt and Jake last night - and Hai already has a crush on Christina - he was playing with her golden curls right away.

I'm sure I'll be seeing or talking to a lot of you in the coming week. So far, we're doing just great. Neither Hai nor I know what time it is, but the good news is we were both awake at 2am to play last night :-)

We've got our first appointment with the pediatrician on Wed, 10/31. We will be wearing out trick or treat t-shirt!

Love you all,

Melissa

We are home!!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

False start...

Well, we had a bit of an adventure this morning. We should be 1/2 way across the Pacific right now, but actually we are in the Horison hotel in Hanoi... It seems the US Embassy had a "printer problem" last night and could not print the visas. They printed them this morning and our agency rep rushed them to the airport, but unfortunately she arrived about 5 minutes after they closed the flight. Yes, we missed our flight by 5 min...

However, the good news is that we have Hai's visa and a big thick envelope of paperwork to give to immigration when we arrive in SFO on Friday. And we are all safe and sound and ensconced in the hotel and have confirmed seats on the Cathay flight through Hong Kong tomorrow (Friday).

Hai is sound asleep and has been that way most of the afternoon. I think the trip to (and from) the airport this morning, and the couple of hours we had to spend in the airport to change our flights was a bit too much for him. He's pooped.

So, after it all, the only obstacle we couldn't quite overcome was a bad printer and some US Embassy inefficiencies... I guess that's pretty good in the long run! Jaap, maybe you could send the embassy one of those fancy HP printers for Christmas? :-)

See you all in the USA, soon!!!

Melissa

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

I really have a son...

We had our 2nd interview at the embassy today... very uneventful, honestly. The first thing we did was go up to the window and pay the fee for the Visa for Hai. They ask you to do this before you're even told if there is any problem with the visa. I assume if there is a problem they skip this step, but who knows....

In any case, I paid the fee, surrendered my passport and then waited for my name to be called. They went in alphabetical order for our group, so we were somewhere in the middle (N for "Nguyen" being in the middle of the alphabet, that is).

Once our name was called, we went up to the glass window where a guy straight out of "Revenge of the Nerds" checked our paperwork and asked me to raise my right hand and swear that the information on Hai's paperwork was correct to the best of my knowledge. (You know, thinking back on it, I think I was balancing Hai with my right hand, which means I swore with my left... I'm surprised he didn't call me on that one...)

Once that was finished, he handed me a yellow card that said we could pick up Hai's visa tomorrow (Wed) at 4pm. It was all pretty damn anticlimactic, but a very nice finish to this process, I must say. I think this means that once I get through SF customs, I really and truly have a SON. How cool.

I've never been so eager to get on a transpacific flight before in my life...!!

M.

Monday, October 22, 2007

I'm going a bit stir crazy these days. I think it is knowing that we're going home soon, but having long days of nothing to do is making me crazy... a couple of the families have taken trips over the weekend, etc, but the idea of packing up my kid, changing places on him again, and expecting him to be OK with it just seems unfair. (yes, Maria, this is why we won't be going to Cabo... )

Today we got up early, but got started late... mothers will understand. We had breakfast near the hotel and then came back up to the apartment. Later in the day we went into town for some provisions, a drink before dinner (the folks in Little Hanoi know us well) and then we came back for dinner here at the hotel.

The good news is that "Jaspas' in the hotel is a very familiar restaurant for Josie and I. It got its start in Sai Kung in Hong Kong (where Josie had her junk). The menu hasn't changed in 10 years, thank God.

Best part of the day... When walking back from breakfast through the shopping mall attached to our hotel we passed the Toila shop - the local soviet shop, complete with russian dolls, etc. Josie pointed out the different sleeping areas for each of the employees... you could see the legs of one stretched out on the floor in the back on one side, one sound asleep at the cash register, and one sound asleep against a stack of fluffy russian parkas on the side. If we can get a picture of this, we will...

Love all,

Melissa

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Circadian rhythm...

Since we are here in Hanoi and about to change time zones by about 14 hours, I haven't done anything to get Hai on a "schedule" so far. It's been interesting to watch him establish his own routine...

He has a pretty good circadian rhythm. He's asleep between 7 and 7:30pm (at the latest 8pm) and then wakes up around 2 or 3 am wanting a bottle. When he wakes up in the morning it's typically between 6 and 6:30am and he's laughing - he doesn't cry when he wakes up unless he's startled - in fact he sings to himself in the morning if he wakes up on his own.

He likes to play in the morning, have his milk and cereal and then have a quick catnap. Then he has a big nap mid day around 12 or 1pm for a couple of hours.

Not a bad life for a kid... or an adult as I'm discovering.

We got our tickets changed to Thursday today, so barring any unforeseen issues, we should be on our way home soon. Our seats on the plane are interesting - we have one seat in the bulkhead row with the bassinet and then 2 seats behind that (we couldn't get 3 seats together). I figure the person next to me in the bulkhead can decide if they want to sit next to me and the kid with the bassinet, or if they want to give up the bulkhead... their choice :-)

I can hear his dulcit tones from the other room so need to sign off now.

Much love,

Melissa

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Great news! We're approved!

Hi all,

Just heard from my agency contact this morning and it turns out our whole group of families was approved by the US Embassy and we will have our 2nd interview on Tuesday, 10/23 at 2pm. We should get Hai's visa on Wed and be able to fly out of here on Thursday, 10/25.

So we'll be home in time to celebrate next weekend!

More later, but everyone breathe a big sigh of relief and we'll see you all soon!

Love - Melissa


A couple of lazy days practicing standing up

After all the excitement of meeting his fan club on Tuesday night at the restaurant and saying good bye to Uncle Jaap, we spent the day Wednesday just hanging out at our apartment. We even made dinner that night at home which was a nice change.

Yesterday we ventured out for lunch at Bobby Chinn's - a great east meets west kind of place (ie, I had Mac and Cheese in a clay pot). I think the cacaphony of Hanoi is still a bit overwhelming for Hai and he seems to be happy when we get back to the apt.

His favorite thing to do is to play on the floor with his toys and practice standing up. He can grab onto my fingers and stand up on his own. He even takes a step with me holding him. He's not really interested in crawling unless it is to get to my finger.

Last night he got the hiccups, but he took a drink from my water glass and the concentration that took did the trick.

He's a big singer. I think he's actually going to sing his first word rather than say it. Again, he's his Grandma's boy! :-)

We're still waiting to hear from the embassy on our 2nd interview, we hope it will be early next week. I'm supposed to call the embassy today and ask for more information, but I'm trying not to be a pest.

I'll keep you all posted as I hear more.

love to all,

Melissa

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Talk about your full service restaurant




Today we tried bananas...

Hai had a big day yesterday (Tuesday). In the morning I had to go with our group of families to pick up his Vietnamese passport, so Jaap and Josie took Hai out for breakfast. I think they would have kept him all day except that I found out we had our appointment that afternoon at the SOS international clinic for his medical exam for his US Visa. Since we've been there 4 times now, the man at the desk knows Hai's name and they are all happy to see him (especially now that he's doing better).

The exam consists of just a normal, cursory check up (pretty much like the last 3 times he's been in the clinic!!) They check his heart, lungs, stomach noises, temperature (normal for the past 3 days - hurrah), eyes, throat, ears, etc. This doctor (Dr. Frank - ponytail and all), told me that Hai has a "hole in his left eardrum". Apparently, the ear infection that we found last week had been going on for some time and his little eardrum was perforated. the good news is, less problems with pressure on the plane :-) The doc told me that about 90% of the time these things spontaneously heal themselves and that we should just check with the pediatrician when we get home.

The even better news is that was the last appointment we have to do before our "2nd interview" with the US embassy. Typically, when we do that 2nd interview it's really just to pay the visa fee and then we go back the next day for his visa and we can come home!! the woman from the agency says she hopes this interview will be Friday or Monday, so I'm hopeful we will be home mid-next-week.

Last night we tried out the blow up bathtub I brought. Hai's still not sure about baths, I think he's just a little afraid of the water. Just as well as he's not supposed to get his ear wet anyway :-)

And this morning we tried some mashed up banana in his cereal. Funny, he liked it a lot better than the plain rice cereal. I tried some and I can see why! I think what it really needs is a big spoonful of brown sugar and then it might be worth eating.

He's sound asleep on the couch next to me now with the bottle hanging out the side of his mouth. (Yes, all you mothers out there, I do know he's not supposed to fall asleep with the bottle, but that's what they did in the orphanage and as far as I'm concerned the little tike gets a break until he's stateside - besides, he doesn't have any teeth to rot just yet).

I'll try to get a couple more pics up now. Hope everyone is well and that we will be seeing you all soon!

Love - Melissa

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Hanoi Hilton


too much partying...


Hai enjoys the music - Grandma's boy!


A little more video

Hai eats his toes

Who says you can't have champagne brunch with a kid?

Hai is all over his cold/ear infection as of yesterday and the fever is all gone. He's a very happy boy these days. Yesterday we got up and played for a while (Uncle Jaap has the playing thing down pat :) and then we all got dressed and went to the Sofitel for brunch again. We weren't sure how Hai would do there, but he's a pretty mellow little kid so we were hopeful. We took the stroller as we thought he might like to hang out in that during lunch (great suggestion from Maria).

Hai hung out in the stroller and they strategically faced our table right next to the two guitarist that were playing and Hai loved that. Grandma will be proud of his love of music! Eventually he went to sleep in the stroller during the music and had his afternoon nap. We managed to have a lovely brunch and spent most of the day just hanging out together.

Hai is crawling a few steps when he's on the floor. I suspect he'll be fully mobile by the time we get home. Just in time to determine if my baby proofing really worked...

Today we've been up since 5am. Not because Hai was awake, but because both Jaap and I couldn't sleep anymore. I think it was the vindaloo we had for dinner.

This week we should get Hai's passport on Tuesday and then it's just the waiting game with the US Embassy to bring us back for our last interview and give us Hai's visa so we can come home. Fingers crossed we'll be home by next week!

Love you all!

Melissa

Zizi Josie (Zi is Aunt in Vietnamese) taking care of Hai


At the Sofitel Metropole brunch, first time in the stroller.


Jaap's arrival

Friday, October 12, 2007




An early update from Mom

Hi all -

Here's another update from when I first called my Mom on Monday night after we got home from the orphanage. Thought you would enjoy even though it may be a little dated.

Love to all -

Melissa

Hello All,
Thank you all for being so concerned and supportive about Melissa and this life changing adventure. I am so proud of her. I talked with her this morning. (8:15 Monday US MT and 9:15 PM in Vietnam .) Of course she had an emotional and extremely challenging day. It is so comforting to know that Maria is with her now and that Jaap and Josie will be there soon as well. I know how much that means to Melissa to have her friends with her to help with this journey. Thank you!

Brief update from the phone call: The trip to/from the orphanage was long and over a very primitive road. I’m sure Melissa is exhausted. Hai slept in Melissa’s arms on the way back. The nannies all hugged and kissed Hai good bye. She said that Josie’s suggestion of the Polaroid camera was a huge success! Everyone wanted their pictures taken by Maria. (Melissa said that Maria was very popular---like the “clown at the birthday party!” J) I know that it means so very much to Melissa to have Maria with her. After returning to the apartment, she had bathed Hai and he was fast asleep as we talked. She said he only cried when one of them left the room. She sang to him and it comforted and quieted him. (Yes, a former music teacher’s daughter! J ) She has to visit the Vietnamese passport office in the morning. I am sure there will be tons of bureaucracy to take care of. All seems to be OK as of now.

Thanks again to everyone. “Mom” McVicker (AKA “Granny” J)

An update from Josie...







Hi folks - I thought I'd at least take the time to post some updates that have been on email from Josie and my Mom. That way, you get a little more objectivity (but not much). We're doing good today - Hai's fever is down and he seems happy and content to hang out with Josie, Jaap and me. Love to all! Melissa






Josie's Update:






Hi all

Apparently later tonight I am going to be bestowed with the highest honor of helping Mel blog but in case we get sidetracked again, here’s a brief update and some Kodak moments.

Hai is fan-bloody-tastic. He’s a really placid, happy little boy. Loves a cuddle. Talk about long, he’s going to be a tall -- watch out Yao Ming and hellloooo Nike. He knows “mae” (pronounced “may”) which is ‘mum’ in Vietnamese. He probably doesn’t know what it means but it gets him instant attention and so being the smart lad that he is, he’s sticking to it. He is such a boy: loves the television, falls asleep with a bottle in his mouth, has all the girls swooning over him, is a breast man and is quite happy sleeping on the floor after a big day. Mel is doing a fab job with him. All the years of her functioning on very little sleep due to a wicked social life have come in handy. I think I failed support person 101, however, when I slept through him crying last night, but she was onto it. [I have been trying to redeem myself with expert management of the washing machine, food and beverage procurement and bottle boiling]. Mel has a real way with him. If she puts him down, he has a little grizzle until she picks him up again. If she leaves the room he starts looking for her. It’s been a lot easier because Maria did a tremendous job in getting the apartment infrastructure set up and getting the mum machine cranked up.

He’s a little but under the weather today. An ear ache and slight fever has us down at the international medical clinic, nothing serious and it was nice to meet the staff, all very nice and world-class. We think they’ll become our new best friends. Later in the day, Mel and Hai went to the US embassy for the interview which apparently went well. The pic of him with the hat attached is them setting off. The others are of him napping and enjoying is “ba-ba” (bottle).

Side note for those who were in Hong Kong . The restaurant in the Hotel building is “Jaspas”, the same one that was on Staunton Street in Hong Kong . The menu hasn’t changed in 7 years. Yummo.

Must go. Much love to all...

Josie

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Crash course in motherhood...


Well, it's been quite a wild ride already!


This is the first moment I've had where Hai is not demanding to be held and is just quietly laying beside me, content if I tickle him between sentences. But let me backtrack and tell you all about the last few days.


Monday morning we met in the lobby at 6:15am. Yes, those of you that know me well know that to get me anywhere at 6:15am, there better be coffee and a pretty good reason. Well, Maria brought Peet's coffee and the reason... it doesn't get any better than the one I had.


We were packed like sardines into a "16 person" van and drove for about 4 hours to the orphanage outside of Hanoi. There was traffic, trucks, road construction for the first couple of hours and then just a lot of bad road. When we got about a 1/2 hour from the orphange the road had 2 feet of water in it... we were not sure we were going to make it, but I think at that point we would have all gotten out and walked the rest of the way!


Pulling into the orphanage gate was the strangest sensation I've ever had. Adrenaline mixed with excitement and fear. I don't think I've ever been so nervous in all my life. They took us in a room to meet the orphanage director and give us a glass of water. Mind you, we've now been on the road for 4 hours, with no stops after drinking Peet's coffee when i woke up. The LAST thing I want is a glass of water. But water it is... The orphanage director says a few words (I have no idea what), and then they say - would you like to meet your kids? of course!!


So after a quick potty break, we all go in to meet our kids. All the nannies were holding kids. Maria brought out a polaroid camera and started snapping pictures. You would have thought she was Justin Timberlake at a sweet sixteen party they way they nabbed her. She was mobbed on every side by a Vietnamese nanny wanting a picture with one child or the other. Maria, I think you may have a new career as papparazzi. :-)


I was introduced to Hai and his main nanny (they call them "foster moms") - Ngoc. She is a very sweet woman, and clearly she loves Hai very, very much. She changed him into his new outfit, a beautiful sweater Grandma sent him that said "hai" on it with a matching hat. It was about 90 degrees and 100% humidity, but darnit, we were going to get a picture of him in that outfit!! :-)


We were put back in our sardine can and driven to the provincial authority to have the "giving and receiving" ceremony. Each family is called up, signs several papers and is then handed their child by the orphanage director and a photo is taken. You can see it attached.
Then we went back to the orphanage and played with the kids some more. Maria was again mobbed, but this time she was smart and said "only a few more pictures, running out of film..." that seemed to calm them down a little. All the ladies wanted to hold Hai - we started calling it "Hai's Harem"... a foreshadowing of things to come, I believe.
After we gave our gifts to the orphanage and the orphanage director - that was all very casual, but they seemed pleased. And yes, the kids liked the balls.
We got back on the bus for the 4 hour drive home. Hai and I were in the back, with him on my lap. No car seats in this part of the world, but at least they didn't put us on scooters. It was a bumpy ride, but Hai had a bottle and a nap and was perfectly content. His nannies told us he only really cries when he's hungry or tired... but more on that later... they also told me he sleeps 9pm-7am...
We got back around 7:00pm, I think. Maria and I were both so tired we could barely see straight. Hai went straight to sleep and we followed soon after. So far, so good. He woke up a couple times that night and I gave him a bottle. (new mommy technique - when ever the kid squawks, stick a bottle in his mouth - seems to be working so far).
The next day I arranged with my agency to have Hai's nanny from the orphanage come and spend a few hours with him during the day. She came around 9am and I went to the Vietnam passport office to get Hai's paperwork started. He should have a passport by next Tuesday.
We came back and took him over to the SOS clinic to get checked out - something the agency really encouraged us to do as a precaution. I'm glad we did because they found he has a ear infection - they gave him amoxicillian. In the US when they give kids antibiotics they flavor it, but NOT here. This stuff is rank. But he'll take it if I mix it in his formula.
The past couple of days have been a blur of amoxicillian, tylenol and this morning a lovely glycerin suppository. For those of you that are uninitiated, consider yourself lucky... but it certainly did the trick. He's a MUCH happier kid today. Fever seems to be down a bit and tummy feeling better.
And, we both actually slept last night, from 9-midnight and again from 1am to 5am... still waiting for that 9pm to 7am kid to show up.
Love to all!!
M.

Saturday, October 6, 2007

boy, that's a lot of balls...

It's 3am and I'm sitting on the floor in my hotel room (2bdrm, 2bath apartment really) with the hard-wired LAN connection because I can't get the wireless to work for some reason... I think it's probably the cheap router they have installed. Something tells me I'm not going to get anyone up here to fix it at 3am.


Maria and I arrived yesterday (Saturday 10/6) into Hanoi right on time at 10am. We met another person in my adoption party at the airport. She's traveling alone until her husband arrives on 10/22. The facilitator from the agency met us at the airport and we loaded our 100's of lbs of luggage into the very small van. It's a good thing we never found the other family we were supposed to meet, I'm not sure where we would have put them.


I brought several things with me that I won't be carrying home beyond diapers and wipes - mainly things for the orphanage kids and their caretakers. For the kids I brought play dough, crayons (a big box of 96, the one I always wanted as a kid), construction paper, wooden blocks, receiving blankets for the babies and a big clear plastic bag full of 100 brightly colored plastic balls. I had to carry the bag of balls onto the plane, there were too many things to check in when we arrived at the airport. Needless to say I raised a few eyebrows. As we were leaving the Cathay Pacific flight in Hong Kong, one of the flight attendants says to me "Boy, you've got a lot of balls"... he, he...

A bag of balls is definitely a conversation starter... several people asked me what it was for (I guess 2 women traveling without any children with a bag of balls seems strange?) At one point I told our male flight attendant that we planned to take them out 1/2 way through the flight just to keep it from getting boring. I think he believed me... he looked a little scared.

When a few people in the Hong Kong airport asked, I found myself with about a 2-3 second delay where I looked the person over and decided... "do I tell them the whole story, or just say they are for some kids I'm visiting". Most of the time I went for the latter, but one lady volunteered that she was on her way to adopt a son from Ho Chi Minh city - and she already has 5 kids from China and one other from Vietnam - all special needs kids. To me, that puts her in a whole different league.

We traveled by van from the airport to Hanoi. One of the first things we saw was a guy on a scooter with cages on the back and about a dozen little pigs in each cage. Lila, this time they were alive! And once again, I didn't have my camera... but take my word for it, they were real. Of course there were water buffalo along the road and as we got into town we played chicken with families of 5 on scooters. I'm always amazed how a kid can sleep in his mother's arms on a scooter here. I won't be trying that.

We are staying at the Somerset Grand Hanoi - a very nice residence hotel - in a 2bdrm, 2 bath apartment. We got into the room about 1pm and took showers and had some lunch. Then we made it down to the convenience supermarket below the hotel for provisions - chips, crackers, bread, peanut butter and jelly and water, milk, coffee and wine. The good news is, one can get good french wine in Hanoi for very low prices...

We both feel asleep around 7pm... and now we are awake. Maria says we shouldn't even try to get on the right time zone, because Hai will be getting us up around this time anyway. I figure, hey, he's almost 10months old, he'll be sleeping through the night, right? Right...

We're still scheduled to pick him up on Monday, but one families' plane doesn't get in until very late Sunday night, so we're hoping there are no delays. For now, we're safely ensconced in our lovely apartment. Hope everyone is doing great!

Melissa

Monday, October 1, 2007

Got the tickets, got the visa, now I gotta get the kid...

It is all still a bit surreal...

I'm leaving on Friday morning (or what to most sane people would be VERY late on Thursday night) to Hanoi via Hong Kong. I suspect I won't sleep much on the 15 hour or so flight... We arrive in Hanoi on Saturday morning and have the day on Sunday to recuperate from the flight. I'm planning a very long, champagne brunch at the Sofitel. I don't foresee a lot of long lunches in my future...

My best friend Maria is going with me for the first part of my 2-3 week trip. Then other best friends, Josie shows up on 10/10 and Jaap on 10/12. Thank goodness for each of them taking the time and making the sacrifice to be with me through all this. I can't really imagine doing this on my own...

I believe the most strange part of the long trip will be the first few days. Basically, on Monday, 10/8, we get in a car at 6:30am and drive to the orphanage that is about 100 miles outside of Hanoi. It will take around 3.5 - 4 hours to get there (yes, 3.5 hours to drive what would take most of us about an hour and a half).

From what they tell me, once we arrive we will meet with the orphanage director, and then be introduced to our kids. Here's this kid I've spent so much time dreaming about... Will he look like the grainy pictures I have? Will he be healthy? Will he be happy? Will he be scared? How will we communicate? What toys will he like? What's his personality like? And of course, what will he think of me?

It is still hard for me to picture what this will be like, even though it is what I think about all the time. I can't wait to upload a real picture to this blog, a picture of me and Hai!

I'll keep you all posted as best I can as I wander through this adventure. Next stop, Hanoi!

Melissa